Messed up 20s: I am not yet done


The time I celebrated my 20th birthday was 4 years ago. And during those years, felt like a short span of time, I have realised that I was messing up my 20s.

During the first years, I felt free.

I became independent while miles away from home. I started looking for jobs for the first time after graduation  and it felt so reviving. It was as if I was a new person with an old goal – to be financially independent.

On the succeeding months of the first years, I suddenly became down and lost.

I would recall the moments I was under the supervision of my family – financially, emotionally, physically. Everything else felt like wires wound up and tangled. Even though I wanted to turn things back like it used to be, I cannot. I was slowly devoured by the pangs of regret.

The mid months to my 24th year, I was devastated.

These times I felt that the whole world was against me. I was still far away from home, in a foreign land I was still getting accustomed to. I was anxious of going out of my rented room in the fears that someone I knew would bump into me and ask me how life had been going. It was not right, I was not right.

Post 24th.

Four months have passed after my 24th birthday and I have never imagined I could come out alive on those phases of my life. I now have a decent job – a second one, in a different industry from my previous. I get to meet people with different walks of life and feels blessed of my own.

These times I can say that all I do is absorbing and never judging.


and the lessons so far…

Always believe in the timing of the universe.

Always pray – because my Lord has been listening and granting (and yours too).

Always keep a positive outlook in life because if you are feeling on of the lows of your life now,  a spur of the moment will happen and little did you know that you have survived and accomplished a lot.

Always be truthful to yourself and take a moment to breathe life and exhale negativity.

Always believe in the goodness of people. ♥


Hope you will have a great day ahead~





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